Q. What is small, ugly and severely asthmatic? A. My younger brother. Jimmy.

Howdid we get copper piping we put a Pennie between two Jules

What did the Amazonian tribesman say to the European explorer? Nothing, he was focussing on eating him.

There was once a family of termites. There was a Papa termite, a Mama termite, and a baby termite, called Motor. One day they reached a big fat log, and they decided they'd bore through. So first went Papa. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Papa! Next came Mama. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out came Mama! Last came Motor. Bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore bore...then out bored Motor!

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

What did the father tell his son who was caught stealing from the teacher? --The father didn't say anything because he walked out on his family when the children were born.

Roses aren't Red and Violet aren't Blue, do you know why i even like you

Human: "Panda get off that slide! Your a panda, you don't understand gravity!" Panda: g=9.81 m/s squared. Human: Oh, I see, carry on.

I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

Is this the Krusty Krab? No, This is Patrick.

Knock Knock Who's There? Bill Bill Who? Builder

Wanna hear a joke......... your moms face !!

Yo mama so stupid that she was tested and found to be mentally retarded.

Where did the taxi driver put his suitcase down? celery

Whats has 6 wheels and can fly? A dumpster, I lied about the flying.

Why did the chickens leave McDonalds? Because they refused to have their nuggets deep fried (Wyndellberg)

How did the blonde get Lost in her house? Netflix.

Q:How meny jews can u fit in a mini? A:5 in the seats and 1 million in the ashtray.

How do you kill off a zombie apocalypse? Laser vision

How did Bob survive the plane crash? He didn't

Yo mama so fat she went on a diet and steadily lost wait

Two women were sitting quietly.

jwe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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