- Anti Joke

How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

-3

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

-3

Why did the girl go fishing? Because she was the bait

-3

On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

-3

What's the difference between a white baby and a black baby? 10 minutes in the microwave.

-5

A priest was driving a motorcycle and was doing these amazing crazy stunts. It turns out they were actually filming a movie.

-5

A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

-5

My trip to Italia: Italian most: WELCOME TO ITAAAAAAALIA! YOU WANT THE PIZZA YES? Me asking my then Italian girlfriend: Are all Italians so loud? Then girlfriend: Yeah kinda... Her brother overhearing us: WHO! GAVE! YOU THE BALLS! TO JUDGE US! Me: Uh I am just surprised at... Her bro: I SAID WHO GAVE YOU THE BALLS... DONT LOOK AT ME! Me: looking down at the ground somewhat ashamed bro: LOOK AT ME WHEN I SPEAK TO YOU! NO! DONT LOOK AT ME! I will let you go for this time yes? Next time I will take you outside and beat you up okay? LOOK AT ME WHEN I SPEAK TO YOU! AND DO NOT LOOK AT ME! Conclusion: Wow you Italians are bad ass... I mean hell this is was a real life experience of mine, I was just a teen back then but I got a headache and threw up ending up in bed later... Fact: I am nearly two meters but walk with a hunch, the guy was half my size but still broke me down, wow Italians are bad ass...

-5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Yo mama is so fat she could be a plus size model because she's big and hot.

What do you do i a stranger offers you candy? Make sure its not stale then jump in his van.

have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he....

In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

what did the white car look like... a black car but the color is different

Why did I kill the Muslim because I'm smart

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Alzheimer. Who?

roses are red violets are blue get down your trousers cause im waiting for you

What did Hitler say to his wife? It's time to go start the Holocaust.

How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

Why did the girl fall of the swing? I hit her with an axe.

Andrew's a bald wankstain.

Why did the girl go fishing? Because she was the bait

On Tuesday mornings at 7:32 a.m., what is the square root of 31? I don't know, because it would be an irrational number of which is not possible to calculate without the aid of a calculator. However, the date and time would not affect the answer.

Whats worse than throwing a baby off a cliff? Catching it with a pitchfork

why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

What has 9 arms and sucks? Def lepeord

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because 7, 8, 9

Why did Oliver fall? He shot himself.

What's the difference between a white baby and a black baby? 10 minutes in the microwave.

fish fishy caoimhin

A priest was driving a motorcycle and was doing these amazing crazy stunts. It turns out they were actually filming a movie.

A Mime travels to Africa for a vacation. He meets a Zebra in his travels and the Zebra says "Hey we both are wearing black and white stripes!" The Mime did not understand the Zebra because he cannot talk his language so he continues on with his vacation.

Anti Joke

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