A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

What did the Japanese man do to the pizza? He ate it.

Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

A man walks into a bar. -Can I ask where am I? - he sais -Yes, you can. - sais the barman Awkward silence occurs. -Why aren't you asking? I said you can.

What's better than winning $500? Using it to support the Islams to destroy America

How do you make a clown happy then sad? You give him pot then shoot him in the foot

Why did a man get fired from the M&M store? He was color blind.

Needless to say,

Why was it so hard for teachers to teach Tommy? Tommy is brain dead

What srtarts with "P" and ends in "orn"? Popcorn

Q.If your have $6.00 and I have a hair cut, how many donkeys are in the paddock? A. Aliens with a hat????????????

I did your mom-A FAVOR-by making you-A SANDWICH-my favorite part was when she stripped-THE LETTUCE-then i touched her boob-OO-then we fucked

why did the young teenage boy E J A C U L A T E? because he saw his sexy dad shirtless.

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had brain cancer.

When life gives you lemons, you are probably crazy because life cannot give you lemons.

Whats sadder than a lost baby deer? Im too lazy too think of the rest of the joke.

Q: Whats the longest book in the library A: Understanding Women

Roses are red, my name is Dave. This poem makes no sense, microwave

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist -Tag

Speaker 1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Speaker 2: Why? Speaker 1: Every member of your immediate, nuclear, and extended family simultaneously contracted Chronic Obstructive Pulmonary Disease (COPD) while being beaten, maimed, raped, tortured, and molested by a deranged serial killer during the sinking of the Titanic, eventually bleeding to death and allowing child rapists to eat their dead bodies.

How many Spanish people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Uno

So, this joke isn't funny.

Why did the police suspect a Hispanic man of theft? Because they found his fingerprints at the scene.

What is the difference between a jew and girl scouts. Girl scouts come back from camp

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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