How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? First of all, babies do not have the physical ability or the mental capacity to ever paint a wall, no matter how many of them there are. Second of all, they are dead which probably will not increase their chances of painting said wall.

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A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

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My did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Gestapo. Gestapo who? Your husband is dead.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: It depends on how hard you throw them.

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What is yellow and corny? Corn.

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If somebody chucks skittles at you saying taste the frickin rainbow Run over them with a car and say "NationWide is on your side!!! ????

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers!

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knock knock? come in

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Feminine hygiene jokes aren't funny. Period

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How many gays does it take to change a light bulb? 1, even if hes not happy im sure he would still be able to change it.

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A guy walks into a bar and doesn't buy a 12 pack of coke, pepsi is better but he didn't have enough money to buy either.

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Why did the plane crash. its pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What was the pirate movie rated? Pg-13

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why did the chicken cross the road? Why not?

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When's the best time to kill a black man? Never. Committing murder is a felony and constitutes as highly immoral.

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What did the boy say during his math test? Nothing, talking during a test is prohibited.

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I really might try and kill myself when I get home tonight.

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Do you ride the bus to school or do you take your lunch?

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Why wasn't 7 afraid of 6? Numbers are numbers and therefore incapable of feeling any emotion.

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Samraj.

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What's sad about 4 people in a Lamborgini going over a cliff? It was my car.

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Why did the skeleton cross the road? To get to the body shop.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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