What's big, white, and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why didnt little jimmy have a funeral? Because he is still at the bottom of the lake where I put him.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why couldn't the black man swim. Because he had never been taught.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

In the middle of a long flight from Heathrow to Chicago O'Hare, the passengers of a 747 watched the engines all suddenly flame out. "Now, folks," the captain said over the PA as the plane plummeted to the earth, "I want it on record that I said it in plain English: a 747 can't fly from Heathrow to Chicago without refueling." No one bothered writing it down.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did Tiarnan not ride is bike to school today. Tiarnan's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the downtown New York worker never make it home? An airplane crashed into his office.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was stapled to a deer

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats worse than your shoe being untied? 911

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why can't you look at the sun? Because it's 2.00 AM

thumb_up thumb_down -13

why was the boy sad. his father is an alcoholic that beats him daily.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

So, these two antennas were getting married. The wedding was great, but the reception was terrible!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

How do you make a businessman cry? Shoot him in the kneecaps.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a mexican and a black guy are sitting in a car, who's driving? the police

thumb_up thumb_down -13

how do you get out of a room with no windows or doors? you don't.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What did the German say to the Jew? Sorry.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Q: What is red and green and goes 100/mph? A: A frog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down -13

just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

No.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

A man is walking down the street when he stumbles upon a school, every school in the area had an American flag outside it, so he sees the flag and atop this flag a man is sitting and he doesn’t look comfortable. Next to the flag pole is a chair with a flag attached to it and the wind is as strong low down. So he looks at the man and says "Sir I think you may be using those wrong." The man on the flagpole says "why?" So he says well this chair is flat and made for sitting and this flag pole has a draw string for the flag. The man atop the flag pole says "I'm sure good will come of this…..im sure." the man says "What good could possibly come of this!" and the man on top of the flag pole looks at him and says "Later……………..you can tell this story to your friends and disappoint them when they find out theirs no punchline."

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why didn't the tv turn on? It wasn't plugged in

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Half a shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What is red and bad for your teeth? A BRICK!!

thumb_up thumb_down -13

a man in a black van pulls up to a kids house and offers him icecream the kid points out that since it is summer and black absorbs heat, that the icecream will have melted

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops