Q. What's rare, horny, and a myth towards most guys who have never seen one? A. A Unicorn.

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People used to throw rocks at whores. Now they're throwing wood. *Hint. Hint.*

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If your waiting in a restaurant for a waiter, doesn't that make you a waiter? O.o

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Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

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hey John will you make some copies

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Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

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How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Fish.

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The Definition of Megan Bates 800 Hamburgers

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Why did the banana explode? Because it was a grenade!

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Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it doesn't matter because he got hit by a bus before he could even make it.

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What is the difference between a Mexican and a bike? they both get hit by cars in shady neighborhoods, like Copiague, New York

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What is black, white and red all over? An interracial couple that has been shot and murdered.

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What's worst than a crying baby? A dead baby What's worse than a dead baby? A pile of dead babies What's worse than a pile of dead babies? If there's an alive one at the bottom What's worse that an alive baby in a pile of dead babies? If it has to eat its way out.

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When time is the best time to make a wish during the day? 9:11

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What did the black person say to the tall man with nice shoes? Nice shoes.

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Roses are red Viloets are unicorns this? doesn't make sense Refridgeator

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The anti joke that repeats itself :(

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Chuck Norris played Russian Roulette with a fully loaded gun and suffered from a self-inflicted gunshot wound in his head, he is being treated by medical professionals

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Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

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What do you do if there's a rabid elephant chasing behind you, a vicious jaguar to your right, a rearing horse to your left, and a bloodthirsty lion in front of you? Innoculate yourself with a rabies vaccine, prod the jaguar on the nose with a stick (they hate that and will probably flee as a result), speak softly and calmly to the horse and encourage the lion to go for the elephant instead of you. You will probably still die as a combined result of mauling and trampling, and it's unlikely that you'll have two rabies vaccines to hand by chance for such situations, but your chances of survival will be minimally improved.

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JOHN to MARY: Roses are red Violets are blue Sugar is sweet So are you MARY to JOHN: Roses are red Violets are blue Who are you? JOHN to MARY: Roses are red I'm your husband MARY to JOHN: No! JOHN to MARY: WHAT??? MARY to JOHN: Ex Awkward silence. Mary moves out the next day.

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How did the man jumping out of the plane at 33,000 feet survive? Because he had a parachute

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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