What do you call somebody pimping out their bitches for very large amounts of money???? A dog breeder.

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bill is either dead or alive. bill is not dead therefore bill is alive

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What's worse than a duck with one leg? A nuclear explosion

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what did the blind deaf mute boy get for christmas? some nice presents.

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Who would win in a fight between a polar bear and a tiger? Considering that they live in different habitats, the chances are very unlikely that they would ever interact.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

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Moo! I'm a goat!

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A man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun. Then he returns it and leaves.

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What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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A woman walks into a cave, and the entrance collapses. She spends two days in the cave. She comes close to death, due to lack of nutrition, but is thankfully rescued by a dog walker. She spends several days in hospital recovering. The experience really opens her eyes to life, and she learns not to take her loved ones for granted, and to really make the most of her life. Finally she is allowed to go home. The next day, she is hit by a bus.

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How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

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TIMMAH!

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How did the blonde burn her ear? In a terrible accident involving molten lava.

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I'M THE GRAPIST!! I'M GONNA GRAPE UR MOM AND UR DAD AND UR WHOLE FAMILY!!!

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A man walks into a bar. He has suffered from a concussion and is now in the emergency room.

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what the difference between a kettle with a fever and a wooden mallet? I don't remember how the joke ends but your mothers a whore

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What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

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irish wristwatch JLR

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How do you stop a group of black guys from fighting? go over to them and ask them politely to stop.

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A deaf lion tried to kill a zebra. It succeeded.

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What's worse than finding a bone in your boneless chicken meal? Going home to find your entire family brutally murdered.

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A man had a blue hat, a yellow hat and a red hat. This man has three hats.

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Why did the women knock on the door? she needed to do a shit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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