what has wings, bald but doesn't fly? a bald eagle... i lied at the flying part because i'm a f*cking lier from hell watching porn all day with my brother...

thumb_up thumb_down -28

The person below me is weird.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Want to hear a dirty joke? Mud.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A man walks into the bar with his parrot, but sadly the parrot was attacked ferociously by a flock of seagulls and it died.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what's worse than finding mommy kissing santa clause ? slave trading

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? Nothing at all, except the WNBA is professional basketball players of the female sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Horse walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The horse unable to understand English shits on the floor and leaves

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's small and harmless, but deadly when thrown at high speeds? A baby.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Okay okay, its not like I wanted a serious answer anyway, bye!

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Two elephants are walking down the street. They have already killed 12 people including 11 children and their foster parent.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the old man get wet even though he was using an umbrella? Because it didn't save from falling off the bridge.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A horse walks into a bar, realizes that he shouldnt be here so he walks out.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what do you do when you see a black guy with half a face. call an ambulance because hes most likely in serious pain

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What do you call an Arab with a long beard? An Arab with a long beard you stereotypical piece of crap.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's worse than having a mouth full of molars? A pole through your chest.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did the African Man get in Africa Aids

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Why did blink-182 get a record deal? Because they play quality punk rock.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Add William Wright On Facebook Answer- www.facebook.com/public/William-Wright

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Q:Way C'nt U reed tHis? A: Because im retarted -ian surprenant

thumb_up thumb_down -38

What do you get when you add a cucumber some vinegar some salt and you get..... Macaroni and cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -38

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops