can i have 10 pounds to go to the cinema?

What happened to the Mexican who commited suicide? He died.

A momma cow was grazing in the meadow with her three calves when the first one asked, "Mom, how did I get the name Rose? "Well when you were born, a rose pedal came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The second calf asked, "How did I get the name Daisy?" "Well when you were born, a daisy came floating in the breeze and landed on your head." The third calf mumbled, "LKJLSKJFSLKJLKSJDF" incoherently, and the Mom responded, "Shut up, Cinderblock."

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the slaughter-house.

A husband and a wife were having a conversation: Woman: Why is the baby on fire? Man: I dont know. Woman: BUY ME SHOES!!!!!!

A man goes and buys a head of cabbage. The cabbage had a worm in it. When the man saw the worm, he threw out the cabbage and bought a new one the next time he went to the grocery store.

Nyan cat had pancakes for breakfast.

Three aliens land in the middle of New York City. There is a huge media story about the first extraterrestrial life to be discovered on Earth.

Why did the bus driver have a bad day? Someone threw a washing machine filled with radios but containing no soap at his bus. Then, a kid stapled a frog to his face. His wife died of terminal cancer.

thumbs up!

"It's A Bird!!!" "It's A Plane!!!" "No, It's not either of those things."

A man walks into a bar stark naked with a duck on his head. The bartender said "Dave, what's wrong?" The duck replies "Don't ask."

The real reason you go to college is.... To learn more about what you want to do in life.

Roses are red violets are blue when i flush the toilet i see you :)

Q: How do you make a clown stop laughing? A: Hit it in the face with an axe

Q. What roles did girls play in the Gold Rush of 1849? A. Miners.

What's 1+1? 69.

How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irishman? None.

Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died

Q: Why didn't the mexican get into the bathtub? A: He was already clean

A: my name is Joe and i like onion B: ok

Joe Paterno walks into a police station.

When is the best time to eat? When you feel like it.

Why did the Mr. bunny play the piano? - His wife Lannette was ill, and her last wish before she died was for him to.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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