Why did the world not end in 2012? Because the Mayans were drunks.

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What did the blind orphan get for christmas? Cancer

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Breanna baked a pie. what kind of pie was it? A JIMMY PAI

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If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a video worth?

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What did the boy with no arms get in his Christmas card? We don't know, he's yet to open it.

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Q: What can you never see in the light, but you can in the dark? A: Darkness.

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Bumsniffer

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Whats luckier than finding a lucky penny? winning the lottery.

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Not a joke.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin, get into the Batmobile.

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A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

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Whats black and cant read white paper? An African

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when the teacher asked jimmy if he was a girl jimmy felt very scared because his teacher had no mental problems.

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i drive all the time its no big deal open the door and get behind the wheel

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why did the blond sop at a red light? because it was red.

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Person 1-How do you spell pulmonary embolism? Person 2-P-U-L-M-O-N-A-R-Y E-M-B-O-L-I-S-M. Person 1- Thanks. Person 2- Your Welcome.

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What does tupperware and a walrus have in common? they both like a tight seal

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What is the difference between baldness and boldness? The second letter.

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Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

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How much Is a free app on my market?

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

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Why are all women bad drivers? All of them aren't.

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What used to be red, but isn't anymore? A scalped ginger.

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Why wasn't the man hungry? Because he just ate a thousand almonds.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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