how big is the moon? why the hell are you asking me?...dumbass.

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(SPOILER ALERT) The following are a few punchlines: "I didn't know what you did, but I stepped on a duck!" "I can't believe I just blew thirty bucks!" "Hold on buddy, I'm about to save you $10,000" "To get to the other side!" "Because 7, 8, 9!" "She had no arms!" "A fridge!" "I don't have Ferrari in my garage!" "The clown can stay, but the Ferengi in the gorilla suit has to go!" "And if it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college!" "It was stapled to the chicken!" "I proved it to him." "The holocaust" "Red paint" "A stick." "I wished for a big orange head." "No." "A bicycle is an object and a black man is a human being." "A pilot." "The papa tomato steps on him and says ketchup." "You left your engine running!" "That's what she said." "TV watches you!" "I think so Brain, but where will we get that many cucumbers at this time of night?" "Rectum? Damn near killed him!" "One but it takes two episodes and the bald guy dies."

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Why did that guy die? because the SS thought he was a jew.

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What's the shittiest thing ever ? Poop.

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Moral below, I understand you are one of us, but you are not supposed to act when I, your leader is spreading the message, if you want to risk harming the fundation behind your status as a shadow and its benefits, I suggest you cease signing your comments with moral. Moral the friendly neighbourhood r*pist: "Ruining the fundation behind the life of your choosing, will always end up ruining your chance to live and act freely, if you are a true shadow, then you will follow and obey"

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Why did the elephant fall on the marshmallow? Because he didn't want to fall in the hot chocolate!

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Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

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What time is it when you should go to the dentist? About ten minutes before whatever happens to be the time of your appointment.

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Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

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Roses are grey Violets are gray Imma dog

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Why did the New York Times cancel Otis Redding's subscription? Because he died.

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Whats sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going off a cliff? A Caddy fits five.

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Whats worse than runing over a box of kittens? Runing over two boxes of kittens.

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What did Susie get for Christmas? AIDS.

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1 pack of bacon 2 fat guys. They both die fighting over it.

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Knock knock Who's there? I eat myp.

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Why did the blonde laugh at the funeral? She suffers from autism, and doesn't understand when it isn't appropriate to laugh. The mourners at the funeral, understanding this problem, ignored her and carried on with the service.

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a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't know where I am, I'm blind.

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I just can't stand sitting down!

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I'm a white rapper I do it all the time Folks don't like me cuz my words don't match

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Why did the monkey fall out the tree, He was dead

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"Free to play" Play free "right now"

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What did the orphan get for Christmas. A key chain.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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