What's big, black and hard to swallow? A bowling ball.

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What did the dog say to the mouse? Cat

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What did the little boy say after he was pushed off the cliff? Nothing. He died, therefore, he is incapable of speaking.

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Q: Ask me how far have you gone with a girl? A: Mexico

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Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

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Cleveland winning something

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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A married couple lies in bed, making out. They must really love each other.

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Roses are grey, violets are grey, I am color blind.

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You know what they say about men with big feet? Big penis.

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sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

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There are 100 men enjoying a cruise to celebrate an important contract going through at their place of employment. The boat then suffers a major malfunction and tragically sinks to the bottom of the ocean, miles from any land masses. Not a single man died, how is this possible? They all used the lifeboats supplied on the boat and followed the standard procedure to deal with such a crisis.

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Why did the cat bite its owner's? Because the owner had been dead for several days and the cat was locked in the house with nothing else to eat.

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"Did you eat your veggies?" asked the shark, sarcastically.

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Why are Asians so good at mathematics? Practice.

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What did the boy do when he struck out in his little league game? He was very upset and contemplated not playing the game anymore.

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roses are red violets are blue oranges are......

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can people thumb up the evil dead statment below please... its important to me. (and the cup joke below) thanks people , ur great.

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why cant monkeys swim? cause they dont have staberlizers.

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Nicholas Salek did not write the message below. It was a joke one of his mates played!!

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Q.What do you call a black man flying a plane? A. A black pilot you racist bastard

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Me-Whats long and hard and full of seaman Him-a submarine Me-No dumb ass a dick

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what did one black man say to the other black man? hello

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Q: Why didn't the mexican get into the bathtub? A: He was already clean

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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