Why did the cat land on it's back.... because its dead .......

A man comes to a fork in the road. He then looks around then proceeds to pick it up, puts it in his pocket, then continues walking down the road as if nothing had happened.

A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

what is long and bare? polonaise to the pediatric ward what is short and bald? same polonaise, 3 weeks later

Halts Maul Reid. Das ist, was ich rede.

What was so special about Anne Frank's diary? Nothing. ZeNaziGermanDoctor

What did the stuffed animal say to the human after the human said hi? Nothing, after all stuffed animals can't talk

Welcome to die!

A handicapp walks into a bar

What do an elephant and grapes have in common? They both have a trunk...except for the grapes

What do you think JFK would be doing if he was alive today? Yelling for help and trying to somehow escape his coffin.

Why was the boy wearing pyjamas? It was his bed time.

0 + 0 = 0

What do you call a feline attempting surgery? A catastrophe, because they aren't very good surgeons.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? HIV

Whats worst then listening to you girl friends problems? Nothing.

What's the same between a school bus and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the bus.

What did the kind hearted wolf do when he saw the small, helpless, fluffy bunny? He ate it.

Whats red and smells like cherries? Cherries

A man walks into a bar. Dyslexia is not funny. -Tag

knock, knock who's there? I'm here to kill u! I'm here to kill u who? .......

Q:what do you call a black man in a wheel chair? A: a war veteran who accidentally stepped on a land mine while trying to protect his country.

what's difference between a pile of dead babies and a car? I don't have a car in my garage.

Why did the man run? Because he was trying to get a gold medal for the 200m at the Olympics.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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