What's brown and sticky? Turtle excrement.

the doctor says to the patient " i have some good news and some bad news" the patient says well what is it dock " well the good news is your fine " the patient asked what the bad news was and the doctor said " i lied about you being fine you have aids, and testicular cancer and you have 2 days to live"

So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

text this number 2066191208 saying i wanna rape you

A Jewish man walked into a.............................................................................................................................................. ................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................car

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because seven, eight, nine.

Why did the boy have sex with his grandpa? His grandpa is a nice guy and it was his birthday.

What did the cashier say to the customer? You're total is $27.95

why did Mary fall off the swing? cuz she had no arms ------------------- knock,knock who's there? not Mary

Why did the man poop his pants. becuase he had to poop.

Q: What kind of bees make milk? A: Boobees

why did the frog cry? Because he didn't get a message

How do you get a Jew in a car? Ask him to get in. How do you get him out? (If they say tell him to get out) Tell him Hitler is driving (If not) Ask him to kindly step out of the vehicle.

Do you know mirror has 6 letters and half of then are r's?

Womens Rights.

What did the teenage girl text her friend while driving? It doesn't matter, she's dead now. Don't text and drive.

Have You Ever Seen Stevie Wonder's New House? No.. Neither Has He.

The awkward moment when you have cancer.

Christopher Reeve walks into a room.

Bailey you suck at writing anti jokes quit!!!!!!!!!!! :( :( :( :( :(

Why does Deb wear a hat? Because she is actually bald.

Why couldnt the woman wear her new necklace? She was decapitated

Why do Christians believe in God? They made him up

What did the diabetic boy with Celiac get for christmas? A gift from his loving parents.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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