Girl: what comes after 69? Boy: 70. Girl: no,toothpaste! Boy: ...

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Do you believe this will change?

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What's the difference between gays and straights? Sexual orientation

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Whats worse than finding out that your family is dead? finding a worm in your apple

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? Because it was a refrigerator. Why did the little girl die? Because she was hit by two monkeys and a refrigerator.

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It was a dark night, I was walking home from the shops in town, The wind was whistling through my damp hair, My spine tingled and i tucked my hands under my stinking pits. I felt like someone was watching me, I walked faster the breath was warm on my kneck i turned around. It was gary glitter he pulled down my pants and gave me the best sucky i ever had. We kissed and i tasted the cheese from my knob. In all garry glitter has a giant knob

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The Holocaust.

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What's 9 plus 10? 19

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im not as random as you think I- Potato

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it noticed that there may be foodstuffs on other side.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says,"Why the long face?" The horse replies,"I have terminal cancer."

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What did the bodybuilder do when someone stole his wallet? Ab workouts.

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Once upon a time There was an ugly barnacle He was so ugly That everyone died The end!

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Your momma's so dumb, she had to spend an extra hour studying for her mathematics test.

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A black man and a white man and a chinese man are sitting together: Cultural Diversity.

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Why is Kyle so gay. Nobody knows

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What does a pelican and a taxman have in common? Both are bipedal, both are carbon-based lifeforms that procreate by DNA replication, both in all probablility eat fish, both have survival instinct, both require fresh water for hydration, both have five senses; vision, hearing, touch, taste and smell, both are capable of at least limited cognition, and both can turn aggressive when provoked.

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roses are red, violets are red, a girl had her period in my garden.

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How many watermelons did the black man have? Too many to count, he was a farmer and his primary crop was watermelons.

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What did the Dinosaur say to the other dinosaur when he saw a huge meteor? Oh hey look a meteor.

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your momma is so stupid it took her 2 hours to watch 60 minutes

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

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Whats Something everyone has except david? Money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops