Why does Deb wear a hat? Because she is actually bald.

Two Poles are walking down the street. One says "Look out, I think that's dog shit." The other man thanks him and avoids the excrement.

A man walked into a metal bar, they were playing Metallica.

ass in my face ? no

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

What's worse than a crying baby? A dead one...

What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

What's worse than dropping your ice cream cone? Man's inhumanity to man.

I saw a poor man named rich

Patient: Doctor, I've been having a problem, I can't remember anything. Doctor: Do you think you might have amnesia, a common memory problem. Patient: What Problem?

Why couldn't the old man read the street sign? Because there were no words. Just an arrow designating a trun up ahead.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't get back up? She had no legs.

Why did the man get fired? Because he had cancer

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a registered six affender.

whats worse than finding out you have Alzheimer's? Finding out you have Alzheimer's

What's the difference in an orange? A chicken because a vest has no sleeves.

why did the grandpa drop his big mak??? Because an army tank hit him

"life is like a box of chocolates", except you cant eat life and hocolate doesnt rain on you.

Two cannibals were eating a clown. Good.

Q: What is that white stuff in chicken shit? A: Thats chicken shit too

a little boy goes down stairs on xmas day he has three presents the first one was a pair of socks the second one was a football and the third one was shin pads the boy was now crying really loud santa is outside laughing why? the boy has no legs

A jew walks into a bar.... He has a beer and then goes home to his family.

What I have learned about the Japanese studying video games and anime (read below for more, better studies): Student at school: USING PENN TO TYPU! USING PEN TO TYPU! Teacher: No Susaki San! You must onry yell the name of attakus! You suspension get! Student: JOSH! I CHARRENGE YOU TO MORTAR KOMBAT! Teacher: KAAAAAAAAMEEEEE HAAAAAAAAAAMEEEEEE! Student: FINAL FRAAAAAAASH! Student and teacher: Locked into energy wave combat for several hours. Teacher: Puh... Lets rather settle this with a round of Shaolin Soccer... Student: VICTOLY! Me: Well I saw a disturbing lot of Japanese people cosplay dressed as zangief... Skinny guys with fake chesthair and red hair that kept posing with their (nonexistent) muscles and yelling RED CYCRONE! Wanting me to take pictures of them... And Japanese lolitas, and blonde girls called Ganguro... Weirdest trip ever... They also kept Looking at Emanuel my (black) friend, and assumed he was my servant... Conclusion: My real trip to Japan was not so different from my above example as one might think...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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