whats long and hard on a black man? his femur.

Why didn't the boy have any toes? - Because he did not have any legs.

What is harder than Jenga? Being a quadraplegic.

A Muslim walks into a bar. BOOM

Why didn't the woman believe in God? Her own personal beliefs.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

What did the passive-aggressive woman do to her husband? She killed him. As it turns out, the slight passive-aggressive behavior she was showing was actually an early warning sign of a dangerous sociopathic mental disorder. The authorities are looking for her as we speak and will have her institutionalized as soon as they find her.

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? The grief the family feels at the loss of their firstborn child.

What do you call a black man who goes to college? A scholar.

How come Hellen keller is blind and deaf? Cause she is a women.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what would you like to drink?". The horse, unable to comprehend english, just nods and proceeds to shit on the floor

Why does Reid always have a blank stare on his face? Because he is constantly searching for the answer as to why his sister was raped, stabbed, and burned alive all right in front of his face.

"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

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Why were little Suzie's parents crying? Suzie was kidnapped by Al Qeada

A minor walks into a bar. He's not very good at limbo.

What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo.

A man walks into a bar. He is an alcoholic, so to make his activities in the bar into a joke would be disrespectful and inconsiderate.

There were 3 guys named Sean, Ryan, and Eye. They were best friends. However, things escalated when Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend and Ryan found out. Ryan felt he had to tell Sean that Eye slept with Sean's girlfriend. Ryan went up to Sean and said "Dude, Eye slept with your girlfriend!" Then Sean shot Ryan in the head before Ryan realized what he had said. Game Over

What is better than a cat? Nothing

Why did the cow have a pain in his stomach. It has testicular cancer.

Why did someone see a penguin walking in the desert? They were dreaming, because Penguins waddle and live in the Arctic.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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