Whats worse than than falling in a puddle on the way to a meeting? Getting shot while your at that meeting.

If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

There is a cat with a collar animal control takes of the coller and and says who cares it's not Our fault there cat is an outdoor cat the girl who lost her cat was crying all year long spending all her money wishing for her cat back and wishing that there was no such thing as animal control That girl was me and I'm against animal control

What did the greeter at walmart say to the black man? Welcome to walmart.

What's worse than sibling rivalry? having no bones

A tightly dressed woman walks up to a man and asks if he wants a good time they go out for dinner and have a lot in common and agree to meet again in the near future

What happens when you stab yourself in the heart? You die.

When life gives you lemons, chuck them at the creepy man across the block.

I saw a man lying on the floor. He was dead.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? It's not. Numbers are not living organisms and thus are incapable of experiencing emotion.

what happened to the farm animals? They were slaughtered and their parts were sold as meat, glue and other useful materials

How do you drown a black man? You refuse to help him due to your pride and therefore you are no longer a decent member of society.

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding several worms in your apple.

This is not mean't to be a joke, but I have noticed the least popular thing on here is the Jew and the Pizza joke. I am Jewish and find this extremely offensive. I applaud all of those who gave it a negative vote and realize the Holocaust is not a laughing matter.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was unaware that it could get run over by a motor vehicle.

Stop being a centipede

Did you know Hellen Keller Had a pony neither did she

Q: what do you call a muslim driving a plane? I don't know A: 9/11

What do you call a pelican with no wings? A dead pelican

Roses are red, Violets are VIOLET!

Whats worse than a little kid falling. Him getting vigorously raped by his father every night.

Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? People cross roads all the time, each for their own personal reasons. Questioning their motives is generally accepted as being unnecessary, as it is a relatively safe action as log as one is careful and heeds the laws of traffic.

What did the fish say? Moo

Knock Knock. Who's there? God. God Who? ::Apocalypse follows::

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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