Why did the chicken cross the road? To collect it's AIDS medication.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a tomato was the pilot.

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Yo mama's so fat, she died of a mixture of obesity and type 1 diabetes.

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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An old bear-wrestler dies and finds himself at the pearly gates. Confused and at a loss for words due to the unfamiliar circumstance and lack of public toilets, he blurts out "Saint Peter, I presume?" but it was just the train conductor. "Ticket please." He searched his pockets and finally found the ticket. He wished he had a dog, but not a seeing-eye dog because people would assume he was blind. This story illustrates the importance of situational awareness, remembering which pocket you put your ticket in, and not forgetting to go before you leave because you don't know when you'll be able to find a restroom.

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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these jokes are not funny but there funny because there not funny aaaaaaaa pissing me off

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Remember that comic blooper? Captain America fighting some dude: Okay buster only one of us is getting out of here alive! Next panel: Captain is kicking his foe and yelling AND IT WONT BE MEEEEEEEE! ...

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whats small and blue? a suffocated baby

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What did the apple say to the banana? Nothing, apples can't talk

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knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

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What did the rabbit say to the man nothing animals cant talk

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roses are red, violets are blue, if ruddell was black, he would smell of poo.

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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Why did the blackman fall off the bike? Because he stole it.

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How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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What did the caterpillar say when he emerged from his chrysalis? I am a butterfly.

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? Nothing, you should call a local animal rescue number and care to its needs.

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A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

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Laughter is the best medicine. Not for cancer.

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A black man a white man and an asian man walk into a bar have a few drinks and on thier drive home run over a three year old little girl and here to month old sister and they go to prison for the rest of thier lives (they shouldn't of let the asian drive)

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Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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