A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

What's brown and sticky? A lump of shit.

You tell me. I have amnesia.

Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

Knock knock Who's there? Cow Cow who? If you really think about it, it's really now

How do you blindfold an asian? step 1: Fold your blindfold into a triangle step 2: Wrap blindfold around the head of the asian step 3: Tie the blindfold on the back of the asians head step 5: You forgot 4 step 6: Your finished step 4: Tighten the blindfold Now you know how to blindfold an asian ˜´??

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

knock knock? whose there? i dont know. i dont know who? i dont know.

how do you get rid of diahreah? Shove pepto bismo up your butt.

Why was the little boy crying? Because there was a hair in his burrito

there r three guys on a bridge. They r chinese,mexican,&american. They each have a bottle of beer. The chinese dude says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. Then the mexican says I have enough of this in my country and throws it over the bridge. The american takes a drink of his and sets it down he looks at the mexican and says I have enough of these in my country and throws the mexican over the bridge.

Whats worse then dieing and going to hell? Waking up and going to school.

What would Osama Bin Laden be doing if he were alive today? Drowning

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

A nun walks into a bar. She is immediately excommunicated.

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

What color is a red house Red What color is a blue house Blue What color is a white house White What color is a green house Clear

A boy and his dad are in bed and his dad is telling him a story. And the cow told the farmer to get out of the bar. Now, what did the farmer say? Holy shit a talking cow!

Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

there once was a frog with no leggs

What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

What's the difference between marmalade and jam?... you can't marmalade your dick down a girls throat.

Yo momma so fat she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook. Chins in a phonebook? I don't get it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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