A man walks into a bar. The ceiling was ringed with dozens of TV’s, much like your average sports bar. Unlike your average sports bar however, the TV’s were not featuring athletic competition. That is unless you consider vigorous and explicit gay sex between men hung like Tijuana mules to be a sport.

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

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I'll take a Reuben, light sauce, and could you do Provolone instead of Swiss?

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why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

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Why didn't Jimmy do well at school? Because he was recently in a car accident, which severely damaged his brain, making it difficult for him to learn things, because of his severely damaged brain, which he got in a car accident, which he was recently involved in.

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Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all broke beyond repair.

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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roses are red violets are blue start sucking my dick or ill kill you

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pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

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two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

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there is a fat ass bitch who lives in littlefield TX, her name...Krista. her facebook.... NannyGrizzly. I hate her!!! with a pasion... she was my neighbor... i can hear her yelling all the time. Please... someone give her a reason to yell. .................Facebook..........Nannygrizzly.......do....something.....about.......her.... thank you. Ima TROLE!!!!! hahahahaahhhahahahahahahaahha. damn it. (: v P PS. she is a bitch

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You know you're a redneck when you come from a rural area and behave as such.

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Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

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I f*cked your mom last night and she liked it. 8====D~~~~

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What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have 2 weeks to live.

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How many types of pure breed dogs are there in the world? 701

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What did the doctor say to the person who is suffering from obesity? Run fatass Run

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A fake pizza delivery guy goes to a party and tries to deliver DiGornios pizza in another companys pizza box. The party host calls the police and the guy gets charged for stealing another companys uniform and impersonating a pizza palace worker. He had to return the uniform.

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What did the homeless man do with his trolley of aluminium cans He took them to the scrapyard and sold them back for money as this is his only source of income right now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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