Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

My great grandfather died in a concentration camp. The poor guy fell off the guard tower.

What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

What did the penis say to the condom? Cover me i'm going in.

A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

Why couldn't the immigrant who was brand new to America hold a conversation with anyone? He was mute.

Help! I've fallen and I can't get up.

why did suzie fall off the swing? she had no arms why did suzie get hit by a bus? she was blind knock knock whos there? not suzie.

I walk in to a bar, ask for a beer, get drunk, walk away and.... hmmm.. how could I finish the joke??..

The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

What are annoying? Ads.

Knock Knock. Please stop peddling your religion on my doorstep. .

What separates man from animal? Divorce.

What do you call a dog with no legs? Don't matter what you call him he ain't gonna come.

How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

What did the T Rex say to the pterodactyl? ROIRWR!!!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Ok

9 + 10 = How much yo mama makes.

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

Why does tundes food suck? Because he is from Africa and the cuisine is different

I just had major Deja Vu... Cool, Brett. No one cares.

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

Llega San Pedro le dice a dios y se va.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...