How did the fat guy survive the air crash? He was he was astronomically and improbably lucky.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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y do black people always have nightmares because we killed the one who had a dream

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How do you stop a black kid from jumping around in your bedroom? Chuck him out of the house.

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what has 911 got in commen with most bank robberies? all r inside jobs

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Why is is afraid of seven? Because seven is a date rapist

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he just got paralized from the waist down and will never be able to walk again.

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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what did the judge say to the lawyer during a trial. He said We are all in a court. thus concluding that the judge was retarted.

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Q. What do you do when you cross an elephant, and a soccer ball. A. That would never happen.

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3 guys walks into a park. Which one was holding the beer? None, all 3 guys were elementary kids

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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Why did the mexican buy 50 tacos? Because he was taking them to the orphanage where he grew up. Isn't that nice?

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Roses are Red, They are also white, Infact nowadays with cross-pollination a hugely diverse number of different coloured roses are attainable.

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What looks like a penis, smells like a penis and eats penis Nothin ive ever seen

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Teacher:What is the outer layer of a tree? Dog:Bark. Teacher: What is the square root of 69? Dog:8.30662386

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What did the kid with cancer get for his birthday? Nothing he didnt make it that far

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Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

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Why is the sky blue? Time to get a watch.

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A man and a woman meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony was rubbish but the reception was brilliant

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A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar and order two beers

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Knock Knock Who's There No-one your not very popular

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Why did the ginger go to hell? Because after all the bullying she endured for her hair color, she felt her only option was to commit suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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