a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

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A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

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I once walked into my grandmas house to find her laying face down on the ground. It turns out that everyone was planking but grandma wasn't breathing...

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I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

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You wanna know who else messes around a lot? My mom. Do you know who else has the best tacos in town? My mom. Do you know who else doesn't have time for this? My mom. She's a very busy woman; dealing with matters you'd expect a recently divorced mother would have to carry on her shoulders.

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It's not ok to have intercourse with a woman who say's "No!" But what about "Let go of me!"?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? He got hit in the head with a brick.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 raped 9.

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I don't trust stairs. They're always up to something.

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How did the dead baby cross the road? It was stapled to the leg of a chicken.

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What's the difference between a educated black man & a educated white man? One's black, One's white

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Why did the old lady walk across the road? She was on her way to the convenience store on the other side.

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How many politicians does it take to screw in a light bulb? Ten. One to actually screw it in, and nine to stand around and say, "I can do it better."

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Burp

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Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

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Have you seen the flock of birds? probably not because they hit a window and all died at impact.

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How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

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Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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there's a worm in my lime at least it doesn't have scurvy

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Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

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What's better than winning a gold medal in the Paralympics ? Not being disabled

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? He was chicken.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops