A white police officer pulled over a black guy on the highway. The cop asked him for license and registration. The black guy had a tail light out, and was very polite and cooperative. The two became close friends, but then one night, the black guy went to the house of the white cop. The black guy brought his wife and daughter over for a dinner party, eating grilled turkey sandwiches with mayonnaise. When the cop's attractive wife asked the black guy if he would like some fresh watermelon from the patch in their back yard, he respectfully declined, for he needed to return to his own home to patiently wait for a business call from one of his employees, who was also a very intelligent and hard working African male. Once home, the black guy turned on his stereo, to listen to some calming country music at an appropriately low level of volume, as his daughter and wife had gone to sleep, for the wife also had work in the morning, at her law firm, and her daughter had a job interview after her day of classes at Dartmouth were out for the day... then Martin Luther King Jr. woke up from his dream, and was soon thereafter assassinated.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what did the unicorn say to the centaur? nothing because neither exist

thumb_up thumb_down +21

If anything is possible try to staple water to a tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the Muslim say to the Jew? Nothing, as he has been deaf since birth and is incapable of forming coherent speech.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What do you call a man with no arms or legs on the doorstep? The Diabetes man

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How do you get a jewish girls number check her wrist

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What happens when there is a jew next to you and you are standing on a train track? A train hits you both and you both die.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What city likes baseball the most? New York

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,8

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What's worse than having you're leg fall asleep? Getting Polio

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

thumb_up thumb_down +21

-Bumper Sticker- Honk if you love Jesus. (Text while driving if you want to meet him)

thumb_up thumb_down +21

How many times do you have to make an ass of yourself before you look like a retard and thinking ''random'' means funny? Fuck yourself HAHAHAHAHA seriously stahp

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Q. What do you get when you cross a bird with a human? A. Arrested.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

what did the kid with no legs gat for her birthday? A soccer ball! I feel bad for this young girl.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Bob: Do you know the difference between beer and women? John: No Bob: Oh

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What can kill you when it falls out of a tree? Anything of a considerable weight actually.

thumb_up thumb_down +21

An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

thumb_up thumb_down +21

a horse walks into a bar. the bartender says "why the long face?". the horse answers..."i'm a horse"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Why did the black cop pull the white guy over? He was going approximately 52 miles per hour on a 40 miles per hour speed limited road.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

what did the food critic say when he was handed a snickers? I'm allergic to peanut butter

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops