What did the fork say to the spoon? I have tongs and you don't. Ha.

Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

I EAT YOUR SOUL. NOM NOM.

A horse, a duck, a pig, and an arab walk into a bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the arab has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in Chicago. The bartender reminds the arab that he's with a swine, and the arab is offended for the poor horse.

If your dying how would you avoid getting eaten alive by sharks or rip to shreds by a T-Rex? Fall on a sword

What's the difference between Jews and pizza? God likes pizza

What's the worst part of being raped by a unicorn? Be sentenced to a life of shame and humiliation.

What do you call a black guy surrounded by a gang of white guys? I don't know, maybe if you asked him his name you would find out.

Why did the pig jump over the farmer? Because he's a stupid idiot.

what goes ha ha ha ..plop? We are all going to die.

whats the difference between a grape and an elephant? the grape is purple

What do you call an asian women running for president? A candidate.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

Why did the boy drop his vannlai ice cream?because Vannlia ice came.

what is the difference between a dead baby in a bag and a dead baby hung in the yard....the dead baby hung in the yard was shot down off the cross after being rmr'd

What happened to the woman driver who drove to Tesco? Due to the pleasant traffic conditions, she arrived slightly earlier than expected and she finished her weekly shop in forty minutes. She returned home, once again in good traffic and ate a delicious lunch of sausages and chips.

Ps: Its "Cain" again, just for matters of security here, how did he install power wires under the basement? How are you even able to use your computer over there?

Hey, I just met you And this is Crazy I have Amnesia I like trains.

How does an asian man drive? He hops into the car, turns the ignition, slowly accelerates from his parking spot and merges into everyday traffic

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle

What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

why was the fork in the wall? Why would a fork be in a wall?

Roses are brown Violets are brown Who pooped in my garden?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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