What do you call a blonde that just got hit by a school bus? Dead.

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

How do you make a little girl cry twice? Rub your bloody dick on her teddy bear

A Black Man Walks Into an Office For A Job Interview. The Meeting Goes Very And He Soon Has A Very Nice Steady Job.

Q: What do people usually find funny? A: A joke.

Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

How many lesbians does it take to change a lightbulb? One. But after she does this, se will probably have sex with another woman

Why was the boy scared? Well, his mother had recently taken up Satanical ideals and in an attempt to sacrifice themselves to the Dark Lord, she drove her car off a cliff and into a lake. Now, with his dead mother in the drivers seat, no way to call emergency services, and 300 feet of water between him and the surface, you can see why he'd be scared.

Why can't Jeff drive a car? because he is a rock.

You know what sucks? A vacuum.

Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because he got shot in the face. Why couldn't the boy get back on the swing? He had no arms. Why didnt his mum come and save him? She is blind, deaf and in a wheelchair.

What happens when you fire a machine gun clip into a jew? You are convicted on first degree murder, and most likely sentenced to jail because you can't afford a good lawyer. Orange jumpsuits are uncomfortable.

why was 7 afraid of 6?that is impossible it is older than six and stronger than its mother

Your mmma is so stupid when we said the drinks were in the house. She went looking for them!

Whats the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? NBA players make more, have more fans, and play a real sport.

Whats pink and silver and runs into walls? A baby with forks in its eyes. Whats green and silver and sits in a corner? The same baby three weeks later.

What did the Taliban teenager strap on his chest before getting on the bus? A blue rubber dildo.

Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a pool? Phil, because that's his name.

One time i was sitting down

How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

What is worse than getting shot in the leg? Getting shot in the head.

A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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