Did you see Helen Keller's doll house? No... Well it's really nice!

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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How do you keep a woman from driving your car? Shoot her.

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What's the difference between an American and a British guy? Their fingerprints.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

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I love this website, oh shit *Car* Dead*

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Why do women wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they smell bad.

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Why didn't Katie cross the road? Because she's dead.

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TOYS TOYS TOYS IN THE ATTIC

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What is long hard and woody? A tree.

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I put the STD in stud now all i need is U

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What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

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George W. Bush

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What do call a black politician? Not Barack Obama, unless it's Barack Obama

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your best friend. No it's not, you stupid repo man...I'M NOT OPENING THE DOOR.

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What is the difference between an Australian and an Ethiopian? One is from Australia the other is from Ethiopa

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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The last person on Earth is sitting home alone when suddenly there is a knock at the door. Knock knock Who's there? *silence* Damn this joke got creepy...

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What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

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What did the genie say to the man that rubbed the magic lamp? Nothing, genies don't exist.

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? Nothing

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If 3 days ago was yesterday and today is Friday, how many legs does 7 dogs, 3 ducks, and 2 chickens have if the answer was red? Okay, not to sound rude but I'm gonna take a wild guess and say.....yo mama is so fat when she read this joke she ate the whole bucket of popcorn and didn't even share.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops