What is worse than a badly told joke? A badly told Anti-joke.

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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Why were black people mad about slavery? Because they didn't get paid in gum! Holt9 ;P

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What did Tarzan say to the elephant?... "Hi elephant." A few weeks later, the elephant had grown a mustache and gotten a pair of sunglasses. What did Tarzan say to him then?... Nothing, he didn't recognize him.

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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How did Jimmy lose seven pounds? I killed him.

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what did the robot say to the centipede? "Stop being a centipede!" It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

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Roses r Red Violets r Blue I'm schizophrenic So am i too!

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What did the blanket say when it fell off the bed Awwww sheeeeeeet!

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An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

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What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

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Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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Did you hear about the man who lost his right arm and left leg... He's ok now he's all right.

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If I became the president of the U.S.A I would change our national animal from eagle to smeagle. Like this if you agree. By Adam Chebali

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How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

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Q:How do you confuse a blonde preschooler? A:Calculus.

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How does Fred drink his milk? -computer

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

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What do you give a black man for his Christmas? A gift that you feel would suit his personality so that he may draw enjoyment from said gift.

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yo momma so fat, it appears she has two chins

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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