A man that says YOU SUCK MY DICK YEAH!finds a woman that says YOU SUCK MY BOOB YEAH!They get married,The woman is actually a gay man!

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My wife is so fat that I find her unattractive.

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69

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

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Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

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How do you fit an elephant inside your car? I don't understand why this task would even need to be performed. I have never arrived anywhere in my car and thought "Sure could use an elephant right about now..."

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What did little boy with no arms and no legs get for chrismas: a bike

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Why cant white guys jump? Well that would be wrong because some can. Have you seen Blake Griffen?

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I dont usually get jokes, but when i do I get them.

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A man took a crap. . . . It felt amazing

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why was the black man forced to sit at the back of the bus ? it was a busy day.

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alex and clayton are having sex at school. at that point, their teacher walks in and tells clayton about the dangers of unprotected sex.

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whats the best anti joke ever? mine you dipshit

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead live in the same neighborhood. They are Desperate Housewives

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What's big and black? An ant i lied about in being big

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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Roses are red, Violets are too. You're bleeding out, I stabbed you.

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why did the gay person cry? he was said that he couldn't marry his boyfriend.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did George Bush blow up the Twin Towers on 9/11? 9/12 was his girlfriends birthday.

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How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. It was hanging on a clothes line he didn't see, the fact that he was dyslexic is irellevant.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She didnt have any arms

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Knock knock. Who's there? Mom. Mom who? SHUT THE F**K UP AND OPEN THE DOOR!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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