Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

knock knock. who's there? me. me who? shut up im robbing you.

If Chuck Norris were to be hit by a train he would die

Who is big and stupid My brother

Why did the boy fall over? Because he broke his leg. Why did the second boy fall over? Because he was having a seizure.

Knock knock. Who's there? Chet. Chet who? I probably shouldn't be giving you my name, just get in the fucking van...

What did the twin towers order from the pizzeria? Two large Plane

Why did Jimmy's mom cry? She got stabbed in the arm and was suffering while bleeding to death.

Why did the black man eat the fried chicken? He was hungry

What do a reindeer and a grape have in common? They are both purple, except for the reindeer.

Jo Brand no longer looks like a ball sack draped over a football.

*Knock knock* "Who's there?" "Would you mind turning your music down a bit please? I have reports to write."

Whats brown and sticky? A stick.

I have an idea! You leave.

Wanna hear a joke? Women's Basketball

What's black and hangs from trees in my backyard? Nothing. Blackberries grow on bushes and I do not condone hate crimes.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Why are asians bad drivers? Driving schools in asia are severely less developed and therefore produce less experienced and skillful drivers. They also have asian eyes (:

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

My Friend Philip had his lip removed today. he is just Phil now.

Q: Why did the boy eat an apple? A: A strong man stuffed it down his throat.

what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

Your mother is so fat that when she went to get weighed she was diagnosed as clinically obese and later broke down into tears.

Why was the boy crying? Because his dad comes home drunk every night and beats him.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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