Carlos was on the computer writing anti-jokes. They all scuked.

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knock, knock who's there? Dave. ....oh well dave's not here man.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, The first line is spelled wrong, Ha, I tricked you

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A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

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I have read and agree to the Terms of Service

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I have a dead body, What do I do.

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Stevie Wonder valentine: Roses are black, Violets are black, everything is black, I cant see shit!

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Why do women live longer? Because they work weaker.

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Whats red, and spins at fast speeds? A baby in a blender

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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2 muffins are in a oven for 30 minutes, the baker then questions why he only baked 2 muffins.

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What does it mean if you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars? You both have five dollars

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Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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What did the hitler youth kid get for Christmas? An easy bake oven and a G.I. Jew.

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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless this event results in you being a vegetable.

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What's worse then mud on your shoes. Being assassinated by means of a dart to the throat.

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What did the caveman say to the dinosaurs, nothing dinosaurs are from the Triassic period 25 million years ago, while the origin of man came around 230000 years ago, so there would be a massive time difference and and would never seen each other.

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what sucks blows and gets laid in the closet. YOUR MOM VACUMING

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Why is nate asian? no one knows neither of his parents appear to be of asian desent

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If you spill milk Don't cry over it..... Clean it up.

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How do you write an anti-joke? With the keyboard Or voice recognition software

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left the gate open, letting all his livestock escape, and crushing his prospects of trying to keep his family fed.

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a man walked into a bar because he needed a part time job to support his family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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