What did one cow say to the other? Moo.

whats worse than the holocaust? i don't know, the holocaust was pretty bad.

I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

What did the boyfriend give his girlfriend for Valentine's Day? AIDS

whats black and yellow a chinese with a bruise

I don't believe in giraffes.

Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

What's blue, orange, and silver all over? Nothing. That's a ridiculous combination of colors.

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

If I told you I was straight I'd be lying

whats black dirty gross and sits on the porch all day? a trash bag

What's the difference between an ostridge? It can neither fly.

what is big white and hurts when it falls on you out of tree? A refrigerator

Fact: 100% of people who drink alcohol will die.

A black man walks into a convienent store, pays for his stuff and leaves

How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

get it right up there, says jacob while with danni

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have said two factual statements.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have five fingers, The middle one's for you.

What's the difference between heaven and hell? Hell likes you more.

What did the boy in the striped pajamas get for Christmas? A shower.

Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

Massie is a fatass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...