Q: What do you call a fish with no eyes? A: Fsh

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Q:What do you call a cow with no legs? A:A hamburger.

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Roses are red My name is Dave This poem doesn't make sense Potato

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Why did the man complain of pain in his ankle? Because several consecutive tissue samples of the area revealed a rapidly metastasizing neoplasm. Blood samples indicated the presence of what appeared to be Hodgkins Lymphoma. He had multiple MRI's and bodily fluid tests to confirm the diagnosis. The man was very wealthy, however, and had world class doctors treat him. He then donated a vast portion of his wealth to research. 12% of the donated money went into studying the medicinal effects of Twinkies.

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What do the angels say when god sneezes? Chuck bless you

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because its owner was neglecting him and the kitten later died of malnurisment

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I would put C where A is. :D

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I have a horse.

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I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

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How do you make spongebob come to Life? You kiss him????????

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So i know this guy... yes? thats it.

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What do mermaids wear? Nothing. Mermaids don't exist

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What's the difference in a big brother and a wee brother? Ones big, ones small.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? the holocaust

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What's faster, a train or a bike? A horse because a cow gives milk

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Q: What did the passengers think of thier Chineese bus driver? A: They were very pleased with the bus driver's service, for he was a very safe driver and got them to their destination on time.

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What do you call a black guy who works at McDonald's? A worker, you racist piece of shit!

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Why did Santa die? Because he got diabetes from so many cookies

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

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Whats worse than a bee sting? -Two bee stings. Whats worse than two bee stings? -The holocaust. Whats worse than the holocaust? -Three bee stings.

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-Why was six afraid of seven? -Because seven's a rapist

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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What Happens when you kill a dragon? Nothing, there not real.

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How many footballs fit in a glass of liquid. none, this football is HUGE!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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