If an ice cream van goes out of business, who drove the Jeep into the furniture store? To get to the other side.

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When life gives you lemons, you should be wondering how "life" managed to give you those lemons.

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What does a gay horse eat? Other gay horses.

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What do dogs and whales have in common? They both live in the ocean. Apart from the dog.

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When someone calls me ugly, I run up and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

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What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

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An Irish man sips at a large beer. Oh yeah and your mother's a whore.

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Why did the black man enjoy KFC. Because like many foods, it contains monosodium glutamate (MSG) a flavor enhancer that makes many foods taste better. It however had nothing to do with race or cultural background.

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What do you call a man with an arrow to the knee? An ambulance because he's got a serious leg injury right there.

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You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

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Q: Why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: What to year old WOULDN'T?

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I don't usually drink beer, but when I do it usually doesn't take much for me to feel the effects of intoxication.

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What do you give a homeless person? Poop in a bottle.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

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So, two men walk into a bar. But the midget walks under it.

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why did scooba steeve loose his flippers? because his head imploded after reaching an extremley high pressure point at the bottom of the ocean. unable to live, his memory was a bit less persistant.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have a gun, So get in the van

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Your Mom is so fat she's Fat

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Whats worse than being a jew? Having all of your friends viciously murdered at a party that you weren't invited to.

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If Timmy has 2 apples and Sarah has 7 apples, what is the square root of the distance of Mars and Jupiter divided by the speed of light if X equals the value of negative infinity given the equation X(2) - E=MC/7?

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Why is the boy home alone on Friday night? Because Hitler took he's parents away.

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What do you call black people in a church, Holy shit

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Yeah, haha, I tend to put myself under a state of trance at the same time I put others down there, which makes it difficult to stop it sometimes, I do it for ethical reasons, I mean if I would ever hypnotize someone into feeling really bad, it would affect me as well. You might want to get some water on your face, you know, so your upper lips don't envy the lower ones.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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