Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks: dude, what happened to your eye? The man replies: abuse.

when life gives you lemons, you should go to the hospital as you may have dyslexia

PICKLES

Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

What did the father give to his daughter? AIDS.

What is in your backyard and is stalking you? Corn

Q. What you call a Guy with no arms an no legs in the water? A. Bob

Name a country that begins with the letter U A. True B. False C. All of the above D. None of the above

Why was the man burnt? Cause he fell in a fire

What do a bike and a duck have in common? They both have handlebars except for the duck.

How many tickles can you give an octopus? Ten tickles

what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Two giant paint bubbles!

Why do dead Republicans float? Their corpse's mass-to-volume ratio is less than the water they displace. It is very sad.

Knock Knock! F*ck off

Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

Why cant Hellen Keller read? Because shes dead!!!

Roses are red The grass is green I want you in my bed If you know what I mean.

A man gets kicked in the testicles... Ow

Holy sh** a talking muffin!!!

What did the chipmunk say to the nut? I'm gonna eat you.

Q: How do you find the population of Mexico? A: Take a census

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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