Rose are brown, Violets are brown, Who keeps pooping in my garden?

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How do you stop a train? You stand in front of it.

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What did farmer brown say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? Let's go play on our bikes.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in an apple? having a worm sized penis.

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What's a Hillbilly's last words? I won't be here much longer, so take care of the kids. I love you.

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What would George Washington be doing if he was alive today? Scratching and screaming at the bottom of his coffin.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after his operation.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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why did javonne choose club getaway madonna wanted to foster

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what lies in ore an develops a golden tan ken bigleys body

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Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's DEAD!

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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there once was a man from Nantucket. I want to ride in a helicopter.

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What do you call a dear with no eyes? A no-idear

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

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Roses are red Violets are blue You think you're smart But I've got a plan for you.. Leaves are green Stems are too You lied to me Now I will shoot you.. Violets are blue Roses are red You made me angry And now you are dead.

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happy birthday! Its not my birthday! Oh i just assumed from your smell. That doesn't make much sense does it? It does. No it doesnt. Are you sure? Yes. Oh. Do i smell? Like chickens. Oh. I wish i were alive. What? Bobbing for apples? what? You smell like a toilet seat. Fine! You never spend time with me any more! I dont like you! oh. you know who nobody likes? Who? amanda burchell.

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A man went back in time and warned nobody about anything and pretended to be from the time he choose to go to and lived a happy life eventually finding a wife. He later found out he had a baby on the way, he named it after his great grandfather who was a war hero. He later found out that many years later his son had a son and they named it after his grandpa. He went to the hospital where he died just as his grandson had a baby and they named it after his father. The man died. End.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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