Why didn't the skeleton cross the road? Answer: because he had no guts

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What do you do when its night time and you go downstairs and see your tv floating in the air? you say PUT IT DOWN N I G E R

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why are women so obsessed with not having penises? I'm serious. Imagine an ordinary woman out there, who is not doing any of the activities that the women-not-having-penises thing is famous for. But I can pretty much guarantee that under her clothes at that very moment, she isn't having a penis. And for no good reason. Sometimes I suspect women keep up the no-penis thing even in their sleep. Frankly, I find that creepy. Why are women so obsessed with not having penises?

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the man with one arm get for Christmas? A benchpress

thumb_up thumb_down -20

So, two black guys walk into a bar... And they pay their tab and couldn't have been more courteous

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Who kills babies? A baby killer? No. I do.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did Henry fall down the stairs? Nobody knows, nobody cares. Poor Henry.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

one time someone wrote an anti-joke, hoping for lots of likes, which give one a sense of validation. nope.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q. what tall and looks like a jew? A.TODD

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Knock knock Who's there? The police, your son just died of terroristic bombing.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Why did the pelican cross the road? The man did not reply because his mother recently died in a car accident while crossing the road. She also loved pelicans.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Q: What did the Jewish man get for Christmas? A: Nothing, he's Jewish.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

If the Earth is square, why are trees smart? because you touch yourself at night

thumb_up thumb_down -20

An asian man walks into a bar He buys a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do you kill a vampire? You can't because vampires aren't real.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

A gay man walks down a street before being stabbed to death by a homophobe.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -20

How do u kill a black man You don't or else u will get intouble for murder but u can if u want there r many ways

thumb_up thumb_down -22

An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

thumb_up thumb_down -22

What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

thumb_up thumb_down -22

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, why the long face?" The horse replies, "I have cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down -22

what do you call a baby with no arms and no legs in a mailbox? a horriffic murder

thumb_up thumb_down -22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops