When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

What did Robin do in between crime fighting? He had a paper route.

Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

so your snowboarding in the dessert and all four of your tires pop. how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house. the answer is B. 500 squids

What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

Hey I just met you And this is crazy But I have alzheimer's Hey I just met you Coopn8r

1: Knock Knock. 2: Who's there? 1: To. 2: To Who? 1: To whom.

What did the pirate say when his parrot died? Nothing. He was upset and didn't really feel like talking.

what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

Knock knock! Knock knock!! Knock knock!!! Knock knock!!!! WHOSE THERE! Wait its a woodpecker

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

Barney is a pedophile Loves dino molestation Stuck a dildo in his ass And died of constipation

When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

There's a priest, doctor, and blonde on a plane. At the end of the flight they all go their separate ways.

2 Scientists walk into a bar. The first one asks for H20, and the second one asks for H20 too. They both enjoy a refreshing glass of water.

What's worse than a crying baby on a trans-Atlantic flight? A hungry lion on a trans-Atlantic flight.

i punched my mother in the face once she cried

Q: Why'd the guy have to fart? A: There was a buildup of methane gas in his colon.

Little Brianna has a special body part. That's why I kidnapped and sexually assaulted her.

Immaculate Misconception - Motionless In White \m/

How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Go fuck yourself.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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