Q: Whats more funny than a pile of dead babies? A: The one in the center eating its way out

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yo mama's so fat, yo mama's so ugly; your mothers breasts sag with such severity that the late great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks

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Eeny meeny miny mo, Catch a tiger by it's toe, If he hollers let him go, Because if you don't he would attack you and go straight for you're neck and you would die a painful death...

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this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

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So Helen Keller walks into a bar...

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Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

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Two men walk into a bar. The third one ducks, as he saw the first two men previously walking into it, and it looks like it rather hurt.

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

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What do you do to become a hairdresser? Set Off the fire alarm

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don't just stand there

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them.

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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what can jump higher than a tree? anything that can jump because everyone knows that trees cannot jump.

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What's red and green And moves at 300mph A frog in a blender

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knock knock come in

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what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Why did the white girl lose the race? The girl that she was beating was black and her boy shot her. Therefore the black girl won.

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Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple Getting raped by a hose

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Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

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I'm winning at Scrabble.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Gestapo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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