What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

Knock knock: Who's there? Guy in the doghouse. Guy in the doghouse who? WILL YOU LET ME OUT OF HERE?!?

AYE DEAD ON CAOIMHIN

Why did the duck cross the road? Because there was a gunman on the same side of the path and it would most likely be safer to avoid making eye contact

what do you call a black person who hated fried chicken? a vegetarian.

A: What are the nine most terrifying words in the English dictionary? B: What are they? A: I'm from the government and i'm here to help

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

Why did the tomato blush? A tomato's complexion is already red so it simply appears to be blushing

Knock knock Whos there Bill O hey bill

roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, which is a serious mental disorder in which I have difficulty properly experiencing reality. It should not be confused with multiple personality disorder, which is a completely different disease with different symptoms.

It's The Only Crayon The illustrator had?

A guy watches a porno. When it is over, he said; "Wow, that was deep"

A man walks into a bar and see's a 12 inch pianoist. He walks to the bar tendar and asks "Where'd you get it" The bar tendar says we have a genie in the back. So the man walks back the and wishes for 12 million BUCKS , The genie gives him 12 million DUCKS, The man walks back out and said " I asked for 12 million BUCKS not 12 million DUCKS and the bar tendar says do you really think i asked for a 12 inch pianoist?

Women's Professional _________

why was the kid crying? because he had to go to school GDS*

what did one sandwich say to another sandwich? nothing, sandwiches cant talk

Roses are red. Violets are blue. I got a brother. He's bigger then you.

ert

Why is minecraft so awesome? Because real life is boring as crap.

Cheetahs run at an alarmingly fast rate for short periods of time. Until I shoot them with harpoons.

Why was little Timmy so fast? Because he's tied up in the trunk of a speeding car.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

The joke below me was written by someone who was mauled by a panther and raped by a tribe.

So a Buddhist said, "YOLO." ._.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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