Why did the man get in a car accident? Because he was blind.

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on the training and hence productivity of the babies.

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When I was little I used to love to dig up worms. Out of my ass.

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Want to burn 3000 calories in under 5 MINUTES? Take a store bought pizza and put it in the over for as long as you want. Just watch the calories burn away in a puff of smoke!

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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Whats worse than being bored, Being you.

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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Q. Why was the Asian boy crying A. Because i stabbed his family

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Sidney was a man, but not just any man... He was a fishmonger.

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A black man walks into a store. As he leaves, the detector goes off. It turns out the sales clerk had forgotten to take out one of the tags on his purchase. The sales clerk promptly took it off, and the man left to enjoy the rest of his day.

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"Hey baby, did it hurt when you fell from up there?" "Waaaaaaahhhhh..." "Ok, let me kiss it better."

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Why could the kid not finish his homework? Because it flew out the window on the way to his parents funeral

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Your so gay, that you like men!

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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How do you make a dog hate you for the rest of its life? Steal its bone and beheaded it.

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whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

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Roses are red, ill give you a wink, two in the pink, and one in the stink.

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what is red and smells like paint red paint

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What do you call a person that smells like shite and chases uglier girls than him? .. . . . . . . .. . . . . . Smelly McD the smelly cunt

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There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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There was a blonde, brunette, and a redhead. They are spending a relaxing afternoon together as a result of being restricted to their heavy therapeutic sessions which they are constantly in need of because all three have been diagnosed with clinic depression since everyone jokes about them so much and in conclusion, they don't see each other very often.

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what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

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How did the woman get pregnant? She was thrown into a pool filled with semen.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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