one day ill be as old as you but you'll be older then too.

What do you call a whale driving a plane? A horibble massacre.

burn baby burn your nanas burning

What's good about having alzheimers? You meet new people every day!

a pig ate a hobo, the hobo was a blind rapist from canada

how many babies does it take o paint a house depends on how hard you throw them

You wanna see something really scary?

"What's long, black, and smelly?" "The unemployment line." Upon hearing his boss tell this joke, the accountant files a complaint with human resources and the boss must attend several work training classes to develop a better sense of racial awareness and compassion. The workplace soon becomes a much less threatening environment for all people.

What did god say when he saw the first black person? He will do alright for him self

A man, John, is talking amongst a group of friends. He tells a racist joke and sees that one of his colored friends, Mark, is laughing at his joke, but John can tell that Mark's offended. John later apologizes to his friend because that is the right thing to do.

what is green an invisible? this cabbage

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it was hit by a bus.

A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

Q:what is the most annoying word that means nothing? A:every word has a meaning your question is invalid. ~Phish <3

*Guy and Jar of Chunky Peanut Butter* Guy; "Hey you're chunky" Peanut Butter; "I know"

A horse walked into a bar, and the bartender asked, "Why the long face?". The horse replied, "It's evolutionarily efficient to have an elongated skull so that I can eat vegetation with ease."

A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink. The bartender gives him a drink. The man walks out of the bar. He drives home and slaps his wife. Alcohol is destroying his marriage.

What did Susie do when the music was too loud Nothing

Doctor, I keep believing I am stuck in the Matrix! Oh thats common, you know existencial crisis and so on but we got medications, you want the blue or the red pill?

Why do women like NASCAR? They don't.

Whats black and hangs from trees? To get to the other side.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

Q: Whats metal and shiny? A: You're lame childhood accomplishments.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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