Two scientists walk into a bar, the pair walk up to the counter and the first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have some H2O too." 10 minutes later, the second scientist dies.

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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Wanna hear a joke? It's here somewhere You looked :D There ain't jokes on Antijoke.com

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Hi i want a cheeseburger and a small fry, said bob. And then, said the guy taking the order. thats all, said bob. And then, said the guy. Ummmm ok well i take small coke, said bob. And then, said that guy. Thats all, said bob. and then, said the guy. whatever i'll take a milkshake, said bob. And then, said that guy. and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then

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How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

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What happened to the child who was rushed into hospital with a deadly disease? He pulled through. I'ts depressing to be constantly hearing sad anti jokes, so here is a nice one. The child in question lived to eighty one, had a great life and a good job. See, it's nice to read a happy anti joke!

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What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, if i gave a rats ass, I'd worry about you.

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Man 1: Is your refrigerator running? Man 2: Nope, broke last week.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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Rejected Disney titles: - 1,000,000,001 Dalmatians: The Need of Neutering - Beauty and the Bricks - Zambi: the Walking Deer - The Iron King 2: Simba's Ferride - The Little Mormon - Cinderella 4: The Fairy Godfather and his Mafia - Tarzipan of the Choco-Apes - Brother Boar - Home on Deranged - The Emperor's New Sith Apprentice - Mickey and the Mousetrap - Lilo and B**ch

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rofl lol, the joke below me has made my computer offer to translate this page. It thinks it's in Spanish

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how do you wake up lady gaga? set her alarm for a reasonable hour

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Why was the black guy in jail He was a jail guard

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Knock knock Who's there? Derek the crazy man in the village and I have come to shoot you.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like pussy Because it feels really good when I stick my penis inside her vaginal opening

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What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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What's the Chinese guy's favorite color? Blue.

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Some parents named their sons: Who, What and Where. Many people were left confused as to the couple's decision, and some remarked that the sons would likely get picked on in their early school years.

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One Zebra and One Elephant was walking in the desert, the Zebra said its hot and the elephant said i know.

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what do you call a black guy african american

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What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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