what did the anorexic girl eat today? nothing..

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homosexuals are gay

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Why is it easy to steal candy from a baby? Because the baby is smaller, weaker and would not pose any threat.

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Do you know what the zombie said? Raaargh Brains

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A black person tans and starts to peel, what do you get? A white person.

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Well Nero, my actual name is Axel Knight, I might have used your "moralman" identity as my own social experiment of sorts, I mean no offense, and if you will leave some contact information, I am sure we can arrive to some kind of settlement... ...Keep your identity crisis thing, I have absolutely no reason to continue communicating here, besides, its six million followers, actually more like seven...

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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What do you call a person who drinks beer a lot? Alcohol abuser.

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What did god say to Jesus. "Dude, she's not a virgin"

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Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Q: What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? A: The pizza does not scream in the oven.

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A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach is growling. "I sure am hungry." the sleepy bear said. So he found some berries, but spit them out. "These berries are far too bitter." the playful bear said. He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees. "That honey is good, but not that good." the jolly bear said. He then stumbled upon a cabin. "I wonder if there is any food in here..." the curteous bear wondered. The events that followed are now reffered to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.

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Knock Knock!! Who's there? The Bailiffs, now get out.

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Rick Ross is so fat, that he is fatter than someone who isn't as fat as he is.

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What did the Atheist say to priest? Evolution

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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good pick up line hey baby have u seen my heart cuz i think you stole it

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, but if the ladder is shaky, you might need another to hold it up.

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- How breakdance was invented? - A certain black man was trying to stole rims from moving car.

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Roses are red violets are blue your mother is pretty what happened to you.

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whats worse than failing your maths test? getting aids

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, He gave me AIDS, And I gave them to you!

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What did the homeless guy say to the not-homeless guy? I'm homeless.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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