There were three guy's caught trespassing on a farmers land. The farmer said he wont kill them if they did what they were told, he told everyone to pick one fruit. The 1st guy came to him with grapes. The farmer told him to shove it up his butt so he did, the 2nd guy came to the farmer with orange, the farmer told him to shove them up his butt but the guy kept laughing, the farmer got angry and snapped whats so funny? My buddy over over there is picking watermelons.

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What happened to the man who fell off a cliff? He fell

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being chased by a serial rapist.

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Why did the Asian Kid pass his test? He studied hard.

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What did one cow say to the other cow? Nothing. Cows do not possess the ability to speak.

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how do stick a dead baby into a blender and why???????? feet first so u can see the reaction on top.

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Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

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Two penguins, sitting in a bath tub. One says, "Pass the soap!" The other says, "What do you think I am?! A clock?"

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Q:Why does poop stink? A: it comes from butts.

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Knock, knock who's there? Steve Evans. Steve Evans who? You've already forgotten me? We just met on Eharmony yesterday.

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a blonde girl walks into a bar...of soarp, slips, falls, and breaks her spine.

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What did Billy say when he met the president? Nice to meat you Mr. President? -Louis

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fallow me on twitter #ieatveloceraptorsfordinner

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how do you make a plumber cry? you pull its pants up

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there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

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Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

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why did the kitten not eat its food? because its face was stapled to the floor.

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Why was the pedophile in jail? For indecent exposure to a child.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead. Dead people can't drive.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

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How many filthy niggers does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, because I killed off all the filthy niggers.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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HEY.... HEY YOU..... YEA YOU! IM TALKING TO YOU!!! yolo

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Why was the black man fired from the bakery? He didn't work hard and was repeatedly absent

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops