What did the ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved

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What do you call a vehicle has 56 wheels? Anything you want, because it hasn't been invented yet.

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waiter! waiter! theres a fly in my soup! the waiter immediately retrieved a new soup and gave them a 50% discount for the misshap.

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What do you call two black men screaming as loud as they can? Scared

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Do you have to be so, you know... Open about what we are gonna do and stuff? I mean I know some people here, and you are a married man and you know.

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What happened when Suzy fell off the swing? She hurt herself.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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When life hands you lemons...you should probably get yourself checked out because life is an abstract idea...

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why did the jockey lose the horse race? he mistook his horse for Sara Jessica Parker

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What did the deaf guy get for Christmas? An iTunes gift card

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The chicks at the bar last night were do hot. The girls weren't half bad either

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what is the difference between a a person and a book? people can walk

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Whats more ugly then seeing a raccoon and a frog f*cking Your mom

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Henry's mom packed Henry sweaters And lots of things besides sweaters Henry went to war He saw lots of gore Logically, he wouldn't need a sweater because he had to wear his uniform during the battle. Did i mention that Henry likes chocolate?

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life is like a box of chocolates... it doesnt last long for fat peopl

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Q: Why didn't the man give money to the homeless person on the sidewalk? A: Because he thought that he was faking it. Two days later the homeless person died in an alleyway from starvation. Nobody was there to witness it, and the body was never found.

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Your mother is so fat she has trouble finding clothes in her size.

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Who is worse than Adolf Hitler? Lebron James

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What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

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roses are red, violets are blue, niggers are black and so is my poo

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How do you fit four gay on a bar stool? Divide the given space into fourths and convince them to share it accordingly. However, due to the fact that bar stools are significantly smaller than the average chair, and the likelihood that the bar has the resources to provide chairs for all of their customers, it would be highly unlikely that the men would choose be remain seated in such an inconvenient manner.

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a sabertooth walks into a club. the caveman set his trap perfectly.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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What did the alcoholic say to the blind man? Nothing. But he beat his wife and kids savagely.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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