What's worse than taking a final? Getting shot in the face.

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Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

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what do you call a man with a bullet hole in his leg? A man who needs t see a doctor.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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when life randomly gives u lemons, u should probably have a stand cuz people are gonna expect u to make lemonade

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A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

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A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

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Why can't the black person drown? He is very well trained at swimming.

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Why can't you get a pterodactyl use the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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What did the horse say to the cow? Nothing because animals cannot speak.

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What did Electra give her Dad for his birthday? Head. That's why her name is Electra.

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So a baby seal walks into a club.

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What's worse then your mouse running away? Getting hit by a plane

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You know it's sunny outside when you go outside and its sunny

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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How do you make an electrician cry? Kill his family.

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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Knock knock. USE THE DOORBELL!

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whats 1 + 1? 2

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How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

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Why was the man sad? His wife left

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Why did the black man buy a watermelon..... so he can eat it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops