When writing haikus Sometimes, I miscount the syllables See, that line has eight.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer and the other is a watermelon.

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What did Helen Keller name her dog? She didn't, her father named the dog because he was aware of his daughters innability to speak.

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Once there was a pig named Poga. When he grew up, he was slaughtered and made into bacon.

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Whats the difference between anti-jokes and regular jokes? A Fridge full of dead babies being thrown at a black man with no arms or legs swinging from a tree.

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whats funnier than 24?????????????????????????????????????????? 25

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1 out of every 3 relationships someone is cheating, I wonder if it was my wife or my girlfriend

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Tom buys his wife Mary the latest Eco friendly car. The car is said to get well over 100 miles on a tank of gas. A week later, Tom is stunned to learn that while Mary was driving to the supermarket the car ran out of gas. The tank was full and Mary only drove 5 miles. How is this possible? Mary was involved in a horrible car accident. The gas tank immediately emptied and set fire to Mary and her baby.

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Where was Sally when the bomb went off? Everywhere...

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Why was 10 afraid of 9? Because 9 8 7

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How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

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That awkward moment when Amish mingle has a member

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? answer: Where's my tractor?

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What do you call a swimming pool full of black people? A family enjoying their holiday.

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Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

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how do you know when your in love? massive erection.

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A man walks into a bar and says "Ouch"

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure!

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Waffles ate my grandma

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I've just been struck by an enormous bolt of lightning. I am covered in boils and my house is full of frogs. I strongly recommend that when referring to God, always use the upper case 'H' on all personal pronouns.

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A bomb went off in japan where did sally go Everywhere

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A horse walks into a bar, prompting the show-jumping judges to subtract points for failing to clear the obstacle.

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You know what turns me on ....? TABLES!! You know what turns me on even more...? TABLES WITH CHAIRS!!!

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Friends are like trees, if you deprive them from water they'll die.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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