What do you call a deer with no eyes? A blind deer.

What do you call a black man playing golf? A golfer.

A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

Knock Knock whos there? brad are you thomas brad are you thomas who? for goodness are you a parot or something

why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were no traffic.

willam dafoe

A man and a cucumber walk into a bar. They sit three seats away from each other and intermediately give nervous looks to one another. Finally the man stands up and declares "I hate bar jokes" and walks out.

Once upon a time in a far away kingdom, people lived in it. The End.

There are two cowboys in the kitchen. One says to the other, "I feel at 'home on the range.'" To which the other replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he realizes he's not pursuing what he truly loves.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

- Knock Knock. - Who is it? - I am - I am what? - I am dying please help me. - Sorry, I don't speak with strangers.

Continents are large islands.

Q: What's grey and can't climb trees A: A car park

What's black and white and nailed to the floor? A skunk that's nailed to the floor.

Two black guys are in a car. Who is driving? One of the black guys.

what du u call a aplle raisni in the hotr sun? graep duahahahahahahejejejejejejahahahejejejwyan

Why did the plane crash The pilot, being an uneducated pilot, crashed the plane as he didn't have proper training, and the whole of the passengers died.

What did the Catholic Priest say to the Altar Boy shortly after sex? Nothing. The feelings of shame and revulsion the priest felt about what he had just done meant he couldn't look him in the eye let alone talk to him.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree??? Because it was dead.....

why wasnt the baby cute? -because it was dead

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 cantaloupe.

* Are you afraid of dinosaurs? * No, they're all dead.

What do you call a hindu that has radiation poisoned A radiatative hindu

catastrophic anthropogenic global warming

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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