What do you call an animal that is blue, fluffy and lives in the arctic? I don't know and that's why I'm asking you.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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Q: What did blue say to red? A: Let's make some purple

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what do you get if you cross the mafia and the yakuza? a hefty bounty on your head

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why was the old man on the ground he fell

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how do you call a big red creature eating rocks? the big red rock eating creature.

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Pianos.

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Once upon a time

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Knock knock Who's there? NYPD you are being placed under arrest come out with your hands up.

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I needed to write an article about heart disease so I did some research. I learned a lot.

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Why was the Jew gassed to death? Because he forgot to turn the gas off.

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How many police officers does it take to secure 3 hooded black men? However many police are on duty.

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24

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea but I don't see why it would want to cross a road in the first place. It is a chicken.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue if something smells bad, its gotta be you! Roses are red this much is true but violets are purple not f***ing blue!

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Adolf the Red-Nosed Hitler

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a white men said to another white men that someone robbed a bank, it was at night and he wasn't wearing a mask, and also the camera couldn't see him, they now found out that he was black.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Sorry wrong door.

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Q: What do you do when you see a man with no arms and no legs walking down the street? A: You wonder how the hell he is walking

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Q. What's the best thing to do before you get in a car accident? A. There's actually not much you can do in a car accident, considering you probably will never expect it, and it happens relatively too fast to react.

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how many dead guys does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6

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A man walks into a bar, he now has a mild concussion

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A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops